What would we do without our Mothers? They are essential for us to be born and for helping nourish us for the first couple of years. But Moms are always there for their kids no matter what. What does this have to do with your finances? Read on to find out.

You may be wondering why my posts have been so sparse in recent months, or actually through pretty much the entire second half of 2019. I have mentioned in previous posts about my Mother. She had been dealing with continued debilitation caused by having Multiple Sclerosis (MS) for the past 20+ years. She is the reason I and my family moved from Omaha, NE to Idaho Falls, ID to help care for her, knowing that she would get worse over time and need a lot more care.

In February of 2019, the night before her birthday, she slipped on her bathroom floor and broke her leg right above her ankle. It is the exact same spot she broke the same leg about 10 years prior. Only now her health was worse and the break was much worse. She was rushed to the hospital and the doctors did what was needed for her leg. With her MS, unfortunately this was her “good” leg meaning it was the one she used to actually move whereas her other leg was weaker and usually had to drag it along. Outside the house she had to use a wheelchair to get around.

While in the hospital it was discovered that she also had breast cancer. This was unfortunate because she had shown it to her doctor sometime before then but it was assumed to be a bruise since she said she had recently fallen and probably bruised herself. I was unaware of this at the time or I would have kept a better watch and followed up to see if it was going away. So now with a broken leg and cancer and besides that having trouble breathing. That was the reason she was even taking a bath at the time was to get ready for a sleep study the next day because she was having hallucinations due to a lack of oxygen with the CPAP machine she was using at night.

Without giving the entire story here, needless to say, after chemo treatments and other attempts to rid her of the cancer, she ultimately passed away December 30th, 2019. So most of what little free time I had during 2019 and especially December 2019 when she went home on hospice care, I was spending with my Mother. Nothing, besides the needs of my family, was more important during that time. I am so very glad that we moved here when we did to be able to spend time with her and especially for my kids to have more memories with her.

My Mother was the kindest person I knew. She never had a bad thing to say about anybody. She never complained, even while she was suffering all the physical and emotional pains during her last year of life on this Earth. She was a great example in all respects.

I know this post has nothing to do with finance or investing, but it doesn’t matter. I want to honor my Mother in this small way. The lessons learned through this though is that luckily she had a will and other legal documents prepared long ago. So the probate process was fairly simple. She appointed me executor of her estate. Had she not, things would be much more complicated. And also luckily she had some life insurance. Not much, but enough to cover her funeral expenses plus a little more to help cover preparing her house. These are some things that I still need to take care of as well. Getting a will and those kinds of things done. If you have not had that discussion with your parents or in-laws, it is a hard topic to bring up, but it is well worth having. Get those things done and taken care of to not leave a burden on your loved ones. If possible, get a burial plot picked out ahead of time, and maybe even a casket, headstone design (not necessary to buy it far in advance, unless the person is already in their 90’s maybe).

Having those things already taken care of and in place is huge. That was one of the more difficult things I had to do was to pick out a burial plot where I think she would want to be and then pick out a casket for her. It may not seem like a big deal, but it can be an emotional process because we want the best for our parents and loved ones but financially speaking it may not be possible and they may not have wanted it.

The points to take from this is to get a will and power of attorney in place for you and your parents, grandparents, and your in-laws. Explain to them that it is to help alleviate the emotional and financial stress that comes when those things are not in place. Depending on the laws of the state they die in, their wealth may not get distributed as they would have wanted.

My Mother taught me a lot when I was younger about saving and spending wisely. And now in her death she also has taught me how important it is to have a will and as much as the funeral arrangements as possible taken care of. The very few posts of this blog I created and posted while I stayed with her when she was at the Huntsman Cancer Institute in Salt Lake City when they were supposed to do surgery to remove the cancer but because of some issues with other organs at the time they could not do it. If I had not had that time sitting in the hospital with her, I may not have ever gotten around to starting this blog.

I love you MOM!